Prayerful reminders

Sometimes I am immobilized by fear and worry, and for this I feel ashamed and weak. What I need to remember and pray that I can put into practice is this:

"fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." (Isaiah 41:10)

"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." (2 Corinthians 4:7-9)

"Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” 
(Deuteronomy 31:6)

"for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control." 
(2 Timothy 1:7)

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid." (John 14:27)

"My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken." (Psalm 62:1-2)

"Be strong, do not fear; your God will come, he will come with vengeance; with divine retribution he will come to save you." (Isaiah 35:4)

Hoping others like me may be comforted by these same words that have also comforted so many for centuries. Courage dear hearts.

Hannah Bee

 

I miss mixtapes!

You know I don't think I've ever written the word mixtape before. Didn't even know it was one word. I always thought it was "mixed tapes", but Wikipedia had it as "mixtape", so mixtape it is, I guess. Anyway, a very nice friend sent me a song the other day that helped cheer me up and I began to think about times way back when I actually made mixtapes for friends and for myself for various occasions or just for drowning yourself in a particular mood and feeling. We all know the I-love-you-so-much-and-this-is-how-you'll-know mixtape, or maybe the My-soul-aches-for you-but-you'll-NEVER-know mixtape, and of course the best-friends-forever-soundtrack mixtape, but whatever the theme, they tend to be pretty powerful things. It's not a random set of music like they play on the radio. It's much more personal, like a diary entry. And getting one from someone else, WOW! That really meant something. Although it's technically easier these days to create digital playlists on an iPod or something and share them, I really miss the whole idea of the mixtape that you had to so carefully craft together on an actual cassette. It is sad that our children will have no idea what a mixtape even is.

So in the spirit of the mixtape, I decided to put together a compilation of songs that shares a bit of my journey. I am dedicating it to those out there that like me, have been through some difficult relationships and might need something to make them feel a little stronger. You can click to choose either a link to a Youtube video of the song or just the lyrics. I've found sometimes just reading the words alone is nice. Enjoy, and please share some of your own songs and stories too...


Rilo Kiley- I Never (song), (lyrics only)
Glen Hasard- Lies (song), (lyrics only)
Glen Hasard and Marketa Irglova- Once (song), (lyrics only)
Jenny Lewis- Happy (song live video), (lyrics only)
Christina Perri- Jar of Hearts (song video), (lyrics only), (with interpretive dance)
Mindy Smith- Come to Jesus (song video), (lyrics only)
Sara Evans- A Little Bit Stronger (song), (lyrics only)
Linda Ronstadt -You're No Good (song), (lyrics only)
Christina Aguilera- Beautiful (song with lyrics)
Jimmy Cliff- I Can See Clearly Now (song), (lyrics only)
Des'ree- You Gotta Be (song video), (lyrics only)
Natasha Bedingfield- Unwritten (song), (lyrics only)
Heather Small- Proud (song video), (lyrics only)


Courage, my dear ones! And peace be with you.
Hannah Bee

June 26th, 2011-
Thought I'd keep adding some songs to the mixtape list as I go along. Here's a couple I like these days.

Pink- Perfect (the clean version)- (song with lyrics)
Florence and the Machine- Dog Days Are Over- (song video), (lyrics only)

October 2nd, 2011-
Neil Hannon and Yann Tiersen- Les Jours Tristes (song with lyrics)

July 22, 2012-
Adele- Rolling in the Deep (song video)

A new year...

Hello readers! Hope you all survived the holidays. This time of year can be very difficult and lonely for many of us, especially if struggling with abuse or any other of life's hardships. All the more reason to think upon the good things, however small they may be or even if they are yet to come. Believe me, I know it's hard. I am currently trying with all my might not to get pulled down into the tornado of crap swirling around me.

So let's focus on the New Year, shall we? Ok. New Years is often about reflection of the past year and finding new ways to improve yourself or finally taking action on things you've been putting off. Its also about being thankful for the time and the experiences you've had in which you have learned and grown and generally having a fresh start. Many make New Year's Resolutions, vowing to change something in their lives. It's safe to say that I've pretty much done a little of all of that already this year. Certainly made many changes and taken many steps towards improving my and my daughter's life, being very grateful for the tiny blessings, many lessons, and wallowing in the growing pains. Though things are still tough, I am trying to remember that it could be worse and definitely has been worse.

Interestingly enough, I've never actually made a New Year's Resolution. Obviously not because I never thought there was anything for me to change or that I don't think it's a good idea. I guess I just never thought that New Years needed to be the day to do that. Change is hard enough. Making a special occasion for it kinda just adds more pressure especially if you find later that you're not following through. There's a line in one of my favorite childhood movies, Anne of Green Gables (also books, but I'm better at watching then reading), where Anne says, "tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes in it." I'd rather try and start each new day afresh and try to strive DAILY to be better.

But since it is New Years today, it is a good excuse to take a quick look-see at how I can be better tomorrow and in this coming year.

#1 Be a better mom
Be someone she can always look up to, can always turn to and will grow up being proud of. Teach by example, follow through, be more patient, pick my battles wisely, and remember to enjoy every minute instead of taking things so seriously.

#2 Be a better daughter
 Be kinder, more understanding, picking my battles, biting my tongue, and letting go.

#3 Be a better friend
Keeping in touch, being available, and giving back.

#4 Be an all together better me
Strive for more patience, be more considerate, remember the serenity prayer and worry less, Trust God more, let go, relax more, have more fun, make more art, and help more people. Don't beat myself up if I don't do it all just perfectly! And allow myself to dream always for a better tomorrow and know that it can and will happen.

Hope you all succeed in making your lives better this year too! Love. Think. Feel. Speak. Be free!

Hannah Bee